It's been a month since I dropped my youngest off for her Freshman year at the University of Arizona.  She survived the move in, rush week - with only losing her voice but not her sanity - and a week of dealing with huge diabetic highs.  Not bad for an 18 year old. I think I may have underestimated how well she can cope on her own.

Not too many tears on parting, though the night before over hugs we confessed how we were both nervous and how much we would miss each other. I think it's easier if your child isn't a home-body.

I'll confess we've talked on the phone once a day, but we're tapering off (skipped one day this week).  I send her pictures on my phone a lot.  Thank God for cell phones and skype!  Hot tip, seeing them on free video with your computer makes it feel like they're not that far away.

Some of her peers are just starting now, and others moved in over the last month.  They're spread all across the US, from University of Southern California, to Penn State.  I'm hearing about homesickness from some of the other moms and of roommate challenges from others (one roommate cooks fish in their dorm room daily).  But it sounds like everyone's surviving.  

Coming home to a quiet house didn't phase me like I thought it would. I didn't tango through the empty living room, but almost. No dinners, no lunches, no waiting up and enforcing curfew. Sleeping and eating when I want (or when work allows) it's like being in my 20s - well, 20s with wrinkles.  Of course there's always the dog to feed, but I can run or workout whenever I want, he seems to have no opinion.

I keep waiting for the depression to start, but it doesn't even seem to be on the horizon.  Go figure. 

Parents react differently depending on:

• If they're married or single

• Size of the family- how many others have demands

• Where the child is in birth order - if they're the youngest or oldest it's harder

• How nice or dreadful it was having them around this past summer - they often help us separate

Here's what some of the other parents are experiencing:

• Walking past an uncharacteristically neat kids bedroom or seeing baby pictures brings on waves of nostalgia

• Bursting into tears in the grocery store because you no longer have to buy the low fat cereal they required

• Missing the dinner table discussions about their week and complaining about homework, teachers and friends

• Feeling off balance because your time clock always revolved around their day

My advice?  Have a good cry - no, have a few good cries.  You're life has just shifted. But also pat yourself on the back.  You've done a terrific job and your baby is moving on. 

Then sit back and see what the world has to offer, whether it's tango, language lessons, long walks on the beach, a new career, or a trip to Paris - go for it.

Let me know how it's going for you, what's hard and what's fantastic.  Much love to you throughout the process.